July 5, 2007

Let Freedom Ring

I hope everyone had a fun 4th. We did the traditional barbeque with crap loads of people, most of whom I didin't even know. We did the same ole "ooohs" and "ahhhs" at the fireworks, ate lots of meat and drank plenty of beer. Good times.

I have a little over a month before school begins and I can already feel the tension creeping up my neck. Everyone says..."why would you feel this way? It's the last semester. You're only getting closer to the end." Blah blah yada. Well, because it's going to kill me that's why and who on earth likes torture hmm? I hope that by the time I return I have accomplished everything I have wanted to this summer and I hope I feel nice and satisfied. Otherwise, I will be angry at myself for not taking full and complete advantage of my short term freedom. It's funny, I feel like a prisoner while I'm in nursing school. Being force fed information until my gullet can hold no more and my belly is about to purge shit loads of facts and theories. Having deadlines that are sometimes impossible to meet with all of the other responsabilities placed on our shoulders. Being so stressed I break out in hives. No, I don't feel free at all while learning to be a nurse. I sometimes wonder if I will feel this way after I break the chains in which my education binds me. Will I feel like a slave while I am an actual nurse? Will I come home and be consumed with my day, fretting over meds and patients and if I gave the right meds to the right patients? Terrified that I may accidentaly hurt someone. Ugh, I'm sure I will feel this way for a while, but let's hope it's not forever. I suppose things could be much worse. I could be an Iraqi female citizen and have to wear a burka in the hot ass desert while bombs are going off over my head... yea, things can always be worse.

My online class is going ok, but there is a problem. I thought this class would be sooo cake, but the reality is...IT IS CAKE, but I've slacked expecting to get good grades when in reality I've been averaging a B. I really need to bring that up to an A or else I will wreck my GPA. I have never gotten a B in any pre-req, except for micro and that is understandable, I took it with 3rd semester nursing. Anyhow, it's all my fault and I need to do really well on the final exam. Arg @ me.

Enjoy your freedom people.

Currently Reading :Diana Gabaldon's Dragonfly in Amber It's the second installment of the Outlander series and it rocks! I love a man in a kilt. Meow!


RN Someday said...

Freedom - what the hell is that? I can relate - week ten of second semester. I'm ready for it to be over. I am so over it. I made my first B in nursing school on our last test. it sucks - I was trying to keep my A so I can hopefully apply and get a scholarship. I am so feeling the stress. Enjoy your freedom and make the most of it.

Christy (Soulshine) ~ RN to be said...

Just be glad you're passing because that is all that matters at this point in the game. When does your next break start? Hopefully the rest of the semester will fly by for you.

I applied for a scholarship too...still no word. Ugh, I'm starting to worry. I will say a prayer for us both. Good luck for the rest of your semester!
Christy :-)